A horse called Monday

Monday horse
You tried to throw me off
First thing this morning
Right out of the gate
With an unexpected issue
That had me running super late
By lunch I had rallied
Was still hangin’ on
But you continued tossing and
Tumbling me with various
Construction challenges
All throughout the afternoon
By email, text and phone
Two feet in the stirrups
And one hand on the horn
I managed to hang on
And made it through the day
Feeling tossed and torn
As I pulled into my driveway
I was thinking it’s almost over
Then I remembered
It’s day one
Of ninety
On my new fitness plan
So I grabbed the reins a little tighter
As up to my home gym I ran
When the timer bell finally rang
At the end of my exercise
I thought to myself
Monday horse
You sure gave me
One helluva long
Eight second ride

E.A. Fussell
O8.10.2020

Unfollow the norm

Nobody ever made a difference

By being like everyone else

So why are we so consumed

With hiding our authentic self

We plaster on makeup

False lashes and nails

We repeat the latest meme

Everyone else has shared

We buy the same books

Drive the same cars

As herds we flock to the same

Large stores

Does Big box selling work

Because it’s cheaper

Or because we’re too afraid

To unfollow the norm

It’s easy to make a difference

In the world we inhabit

It may be a small difference

But that doesn’t matter

We can still have an impact

By listening to our inner self

Not the one that’s always talking

The one that’s subtle often silent

Until we get quiet and listen

It’s okay

If we are the only one who knows

What our inner self wants us to do

We don’t have to make a show of it

That’s the ego

(the one who’s always talking)

Trying to take over

Just quietly do something different

That raises your vibration

Makes you feel better

Inside there is an authentic soul

Waiting to be heard

It may come in the form of a feeling

Or be journaled into a word

You will understand

How to recognize it

If you just get quiet

And the more time you take to listen

Your understanding will get better

And you will feel and see

The impact

Subtle, or sometimes huge

A small change can have

On your life and your world

It’s amazing

How spending quiet time

With ourselves

Can make us feel more connected

To our creator, our environment

And all the other souls

Some of whom we know

Some we may never meet

But if we raise our vibration

For ourselves

As God created us to do

We inevitably support

All of God’s creation

E.A. Fussell

08.09.2020

Hopelessly hoping

Drug addiction

I have not had

But I’ve watched it

Fuck my son up

Real bad

Fifteen years ago or so

He was an aspiring young man

Had the world in his hand

Then things took a turn

He made wrong decisions

That have left him to burn

With an emptiness

That can never be filled

By any amount of

Hits or shots or pills

He poisons his body

Willingly

All the while lying to

His family

Prayer, so much prayer

Has been offered up

To the point I have thought

Of giving up

A parents never ending cycle of

Anger, heartbreak, hope

When it comes to

Watching your child

Addicted to dope

I’ve tried to help him

His dad has too

But we are helpless

Against the evil

He eagerly consumes

Money, so much money

Has been spent

With doubts some of it

Ever went where it was meant

As we cry ourselves

To sleep at night

Drug addiction

Holds our son real tight

Taking away his chance

To enjoy this life

When it comes

To me loving my son

I’m a real sucker

And to me

Drug addiction

Is a true mother fucker

Every dollar I invest

Every tear I shed

Drug addiction just laughs

And holds my son tighter

But I keep holding on to

One last hope

That there really is a God

And that He knows

I would give up everything

Including my life

If He would just free my son

From the grasp of dope

As I wait and continue to pray

Each and every single day

Silently inside my heart I still hear

My little boy crying

Mommy please

Love me

Until I’m me again

E.A. Fussell

08.07.2020

If I were graffiti

If I were graffiti

I’d spray myself all around

The ugliest parts of every town

Spreading a message

Positive and bright

For those who find it hard

To even try

Believing in themselves

Or anything good

I’d brighten the saddest

Neighborhoods

Encouraging young and old

To embrace life

To be brave and bold

To follow their dreams and vision

To have lots of fun

And live a life filled with passion

E.A. Fussell

07.31.2020

Quietly waiting

How does one find

Peace and quiet

How do you

My experience has been

That it’s an elusive state of being

The more I chase it

The further away it gets

However when I stop chasing

For long enough

There it is

Embracing me

The golden key

Is just allowing it to be

Without thinking

But fully knowing

That it is there

Waiting for me

Peace and quiet

Accessible

At any given moment

Unless I chase it

Then it will flee

It’s secret is in

That it waits for me

To comprehend

Thoughts are it’s enemy

It doesn’t have to be found

But thoughts keep pushing

It around

Until thoughts fill my mind

And then peace and quiet

I cannot find

But when I let thoughts go

What do you know

Peace and quiet

All aglow

E.A. Fussell

07.31.2020

Reading signs

In reality

There are no limitations on us

Regardless of the signs others post

The limitations only exist in our mind

If the signs we see say NO

We can dive a little deeper

Within ourselves

To see what direction we should go

Our core being is part of creation

Molded by the living God’s hand

When we stop listening to the world

We can see our plan

The path we should take

The sense it makes

When we stop looking outside

We can see within

E.A. Fussell

07.30.2020

Attaining mastery

Being brave is a decision

Bravery requires vulnerability

Combined with

A silent acknowledgement

That you may be hurt, or ignored

Kindness can be an act of bravery

And can sometimes result in

The deepest kind of hurt or

Ignorant rejection

Brave souls understand this

It’s easy to be kind

To kind people

Being kind to the unkind

Or to the downright hateful

That takes a type of bravery

That I may never master

E.A. Fussell

07.29.2020

You and you alone know

Learn to be okay

With people not knowing

Your side of the story

They will believe whatever

They want to

Regardless of your truth

Can’t you see

Your truth is really only

Your truth

You are the only one

Who knows what’s in your heart

Or in your head

It’s your experience alone

And others

Can never fully comprehend

What your experience has been

Just as you

Can never fully comprehend theirs

Stop trying to explain yourself

It’s a waist of energy

Just be yourself

Some will like you

Some won’t

That’s okay

Our purpose here

Is not to win a popularity contest

Our purpose is to be our best self

Not a carbon copy of someone else

Not a puppet

Allowing others to pull the strings

Not a docile

Go-along-with-the-crowd crony

Not a one-day-when goal seeker

Our purpose is to be

The best version

Of what we were created to be

Artist, writer, farmer, teacher, singer

Doctor, lawyer, architect, contractor

Realtor, laborer, driver, rancher

So many labels to choose from

Don’t accept any on them

They can never fully express

Who you are

A unique individual with

Independent thoughts and ideas

Find a way to be okay

With only you

Knowing the truth

About you

E.A. Fussell

07.28.2020