I set my alarm for 4:20am
Out the door by 4:30am
On my way to the gym
I just do it
Ignoring the excuses
My mind tries to present
Disengaging from
The internal argument
That more time in bed
Would be well spent
I wake up and work out
One day the results
Will be evident
E.A. Fussell
5/9/2019
Got my rose colored glasses on
Ignoring my sore muscles from
Weight training week one
Ignoring my scale
Trying to anyway
Chilling on my sofa chewing kale
The pain will get easier
The scale will get lighter
The kale will get swallowed
Patience girl
Patience
Just show up for yourself
Every day
E.A. Fussell
04/25/2019
Down
Up
Down
Up
Yo-yoing along
So very tired of fighting
This battle with the scale
Maybe I’ll just let
The weight stay on
E.A. Fussell
4/8/2019
Sometimes you make me happy
Sometimes you make me blue
Up or down
Why is my self worth so tied to you
First thing in the morning
Nothing on but an anxious stare
What number
Will I find waiting there
There’s nothing quite like
The pressure that plays
Around in my brain on
Weigh-in days
E.A. Fussell
4/2/2019
Same old story
The couch won out
I was on a roll
Then I got worn-out
Took a few days to recoup
Turned into months
Where did all that time go?
Now I’m feeling really stupid
All my fitness progress
Got lost in a few moments
The older I get the harder it is
To dedicate time
To go to the gym
I know
The battle is all in my mind
Well, my dear cousin Debora
Has inspired me
To start over again
It won’t be easy
I might be slow
But all I have to do now
Is get my butt off the couch
And go
Knowing she is doing the same
Will keep me moving
Even if it’s in the slow lane
I’ve set a goal
Squats, planks, running
And handstands
Yes, handstands
By my birthday
In mid-May
Telling myself
“You can do it!
No, you’re not too old!”
E.A. Fussell
02-24-2019
It seems like
A constant struggle
To lose one pound
Will the confounded scale
Ever go down
Is all this effort
Really worth getting fit
Just keep telling yourself “You can do it”
E.A. Fussell
1/19/2019
Learning how to block time
Each day
And focus on one thing
One specific life intention
One aspect of work
One area of self improvement
Easier said than done
This focusing on just one
Theory says
Great gains can be made
In a short amount of time
If we focus on one thing
Set aside distractions
Dedicate our mind
To thinking on one thing
Dedicate our body
To practicing one thing
Theory says
That’s how experts
Become experts
Ignoring distractions
Pushing them
Out of the way
To focus on one thing
For a specific period of time
Each and every day
It has been my experience
Focusing on just one
Is easier said than done
E.A. Fussell
01/12/2019
December, the warning flag that another year is about to end and a new one begin. This is the time of year my best friend Sherry “Ladybug” Underwood and I would spend most of our visits reviewing the past year, celebrating our triumphs, and hashing-out disappointments. We would applaud each other on the good things, and encourage each other to let the bad things go. Then we would focus on the new year and new possibilities ahead. We would plot, and plan, and dream. Nothing was too big for our imaginations.
One thing that was always on our list, that I don’t think she would mind sharing, was losing weight and getting healthier. We would make a plan to start January 1st or the Monday closest to it. One of her favorite sayings was “Monday is a good day to start something new.”
Earlier this year she was called home and left this world for a much better one. It feels weird to face December without her.
She would have been my first call when Iweighed this morning and discovered I am within a few pounds of the same weight I was this time last year. She would have heard me cuss-and-fuss and she would have chuckled said something like, “Don’t start a new diet now, wait until the new year and we can start on Monday” chuckling again. And I would be disagreeable, saying something like, “If I wait until then I will have even more weight to lose.” She would patiently listen to my new intention and then cheer me on daily.
Well she’s not here to listen patiently, so I am just throwing my thoughts down on paper…wait this isn’t paper…throwing my thoughts down on a digital screen.
I weighed today. The &@?!$ scale said I weigh 201.8 pounds. Over the past year I have bounced up-and-down between 188-214. I have tried Keto, Vegetarian, Protein Shakes, Fasting, high fat, low fat, no fat blah-blah-blah. This is ridiculous!
My dad recently sent me a program called “FOOD, What The Heck Should I Eat?” by Dr. Mark Hyman. Looks like it is time to start. So, I am starting over…again.
Today, December 1st, 2018, my intention is to use the doctor’s guidelines in FOOD for nutrition. And, my new Fitbit to track my intention of 10,000 steps a day. My weight loss goal is 50 pounds by my birthday in May.
There will be other conversations I miss having with my best friend as I face the future but for now, she is chuckling in my memory, and cheering me on ”5 months, 50 pounds, you can do this!”
E.A. Fussell
12/01/2018
Thanksgiving week has been a blast
Gosh, it sure did go by fast
Too much food upon my plate
Now the scale says
I’ve gained a-bunch-of-weight
Headed back to Texas
Jogging suit in hand
Hit the gym early each morning
That’s my plan
I offer you my apologies
In advance
For the motivational posts
You are sure to glance
As I talk-to-myself-out-loud
While I plan and gauge
How to make myself proud
By New Years Day
E.A. Fussell
11/26/2018
E. A. Fussell 