Circling agony

Sleeping

Isn’t always restful

Even if it’s comfortable

Hanging onto things

We can’t change

Refusing to accept them

As they are

Unable to let them go

Wrestling with the anxiety

They bring

Tossing and turning

Acid burning in the stomach

Trying to make it through the night

Not knowing what to do

Having nowhere to go

Holding onto familiar misery

Like an old worn security blanket

Sleep coming in brief interludes

When the mind stops

Processing it’s circles of thought

Exhausted and needing a break

Wrapped in the comfort

Of this old familiar cycle of agony

Drifting off to sleep

Only to awake

Within the hour or so

And start the churning again

Wondering if it will ever end

Knowing that only when

A new choice is made

In the waking hours

Will restful sleep

Be ours

E.A. Fussell

10.13.2020

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